Thursday, August 27, 2015

Get. Back. Up.

Take a gander at the sidebar labeled "Updates & Happenings." If you're feeling lazy, here's a screenshot...


See those highlighted portions? Those are the current stats for THESE WICKED WATERS. And these stats aren't counting the agents who equate silence with a big fat NO.

I queried fifty agents.

So basically, imagine that 25 as an enormous five, zero.

What's my reaction, you ask?

THIS!


Excuse me, rejections in my inbox, I really don't care about you (anymore, at least). I've heard the phrase thrown around writerly circles, "Don't give up until you send 100 query letters."

Well, guys! I'm only halfway there. I've done some tweaking on my query letter to alter the focus to other elements.

Placing in the few contests that I already have is proof to me that THESE WICKED WATERS is worth something.

I'm not giving up.

Neither should you.

Even if it means totally redoing your query letter, your cliched plot, or your synopsis.

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

Query Critique #3: BEFORE ALL IS LOST

My thoughts are added in redI may underline a sentence to draw attention for discussion. Every comment is my own opinion. Readers, feel free to leave your own comments below and help a fellow writer out!

If you're interested in a Free Query Critique, follow the link for more information.

Original Version (with comments):

Dear [Insert Agent's Name]:

Lady Henrietta Wickes was rich, pretty, and happy.

Lord Benedict Wickes was rich, handsome, and evil.

When Henrietta found out, she blindly ran. (The way you have this worded makes me think that your book is dual POV. If that's the case--great! If not, you may want to reconsider your opening. Also, instead of telling us Lady Wickes was happy and Lord Wickes was evil, show us in that opening line. Something like: Lady Henriette Wickes has the perfect life--until she uncovers her husband, Lord Wickes', secret experiments on orphans (maybe he's not doing that, but you get the drift). Then move on to your line, Disgusted with her husband's malicious actions, she blindly ran.) Now she's stuck in the cutthroat underbelly of society known as the Crease (This has me thinking it's Dysotopian. Is that the case? Or is it fantasy? Might want to make that clear up front by saying In the world of _____, Lady Henriette Wickes has the perfect life...).  Henrietta is rescued by a group called Temper Mints and finds refuge in the patchwork family of illegal magicians, mechanics, and thieves (You've hooked my attentions here! Love the concept of illegal magicians, mechanics, and thieves!).

Henrietta trades her social savvy for street smarts.

Benedict plans to replace the aristocracy with a tyranny (Again, here makes me think that there's dual POV going on).

 Struggling with ethics dealing with law versus humanity (Show us how she's struggling instead of telling us. Give events from the book that show this), Henrietta must protect her new friends,  fight off a new love interest (Why is she fighting off a new love interest?), and save the country from her husband.

BEFORE ALL IS LOST is my debut (You could cut this word, you don't need to tell an agents it's your first book!). It is a 71,000 word YA novel. The full manuscript is available on request. (Another version of this line could be: BEFORE ALL IS LOST is a 71,000 word YA novel.)

(Another note, from the beginning, I was thinking this was an adult novel because your MC is already married. Might want to mention her age up front)

Thank you for your time and consideration.

FINAL NOTES:

I plugged your query into MS word and the "meat" of it only came to 102 words. The basic line for a query letter is 250. I think you could stand to add some more plot in the end, especially some more information about what Henrietta is doing with these illegal MMTs as well as her husband's plan. Let me know if you want me to take another look at any of your edits. Good luck!

Friday, August 21, 2015

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Stargardt's Disease, An Interview

As part of researching for my next book, SECOND-HAND SCAVENGERS, I've been talking to an awesome friend from Australia. Her name is Chrissy and she has Stargardt's Disease (just like my main character, Jane, will). 

What is Stargardt's Disease? In simple terms, in the early part of an individual's life, (usually before the age of 20), their central vision steadily decreases until they are legally blind.

Chrissy was kind enough to answer a few (of my many-to-come) questions and let me stick them on my blog. I hope to help raise awareness about Stargardt's through this post and my book. Be awesome and give it a share, readers!

1.  In my book, the main character is going to be roughly 16 years old and has just been diagnosed with Stargardt’s. In your case, what age were you diagnosed?

I was diagnosed at 23 in my last year at uni. I think being 16 would be really difficult as it’s already a difficult time for a teenager. My main concern was having to change my life plan and I think this would be relevant for a teen too. There’s also the social aspect as it’s hard to tell people because they have never heard of it and just don’t understand at all!

2.  Before you were diagnosed, did you wear glasses or have any vision trouble?

No I had perfect vision. I never owned glasses. I had check-ups sporadically and nothing was ever found. 

3.  If you can remember, what was your vision like when you were first diagnosed with Stargardt’s?

It was around 6/15 in one eye and 6/12 in the other. I had my driver’s licence and was still driving though the legal limit here is 6/12.  I had noticed that I couldn’t read the board at uni and even sitting up closer I was still having trouble. I also noticed that at night my vision was worse and when I was driving all the lights from cars, traffic lights etc would blend together and make it hard for me to figure out what was going on. I noticed that was reading I wasn’t looking directly at the words, I’d look slightly above (because of the blind spot). I’d actually thought I’d lazily trained myself to read wrong! The other thing was sometimes people noticed  when I was looking at them talking I wasn’t actually looking at their eyes I was looking above at their forehead.

4.  What is your vision level now?

I’m now legally blind at 6/60. It took about three years to get to that level. I read with magnification and large print. I don’t read long documents anymore I use audio a lot. If I’m having conversations with people I can’t usually see their face but I look directly at them because I don’t want to look weird looking at them with my peripheral. When I walk down the street it’s like I’m walking into a tunnel of nothingness. I can see in my peripheral but don’t know what’s coming probably about 15 steps ahead.

5.  Are there any support groups for people with Stargardt’s? Or any therapists or online forums? I’d love to know of some that I can put in my book (and direct others to).

There’s your local vision organisations eg we have Vision Australia and Guide Dogs. Support groups are usually through Facebook. I think some areas in the US have local support groups, I know The Foundation Fighting Blindness has a New York based support group. But really there’s not many of us so in smaller citties/towns it would more likely be a general ‘vision impaired’ support group rather than Stargardt’s specifically. 

6.  What sorts of “helpers” do you use to read things online as well as books? 

I’m audiobook obsessed. I used Audible as I find they have the most content and they have an app you can have on your phone that saves where you are, can speed up/down the audio, buy the books straight on there. There’s also software called Jaws that is a screenreader for the computer. I don’t use this I only use Zoomtext for reading short webpages. I also used software called Kurzweil 3000 (the people that make pianos) for long documents and uni work. I load the file into the software and it will read it to me and highlighting where I’m at. I only got it this year so still learning all its functionality.

7.  Are there any terms I should avoid while writing out of respect? I don’t want to offend anyone.

I’ll look into this more. I have come across people being offended by ‘vision impaired’. I don’t have a problem with it at all. Legally blind is fine too. I tend to use either of the two on my blog and have never had anybody say anything.

8.  Anything else you’d like to add would be great. I’m looking for as much information as possible!


I could go on forever!! If you have particular situations you’d like me to explain how I perceive it I would be happy to! I also think anxiety and depression are a huge part of this diagnosis. Nobody talks about it and when I have brought it up everybody opens up and talks about their experiences. It’s not just a visual condition there are so many more aspects to it. Physically you get eye strain, migraines, headaches, neck pain and nausea. Also, because it is degenerative, it can be hard to accept as it continually declines and you can’t predict how fast or how bad it will get. It’s like a lottery. Anything else, at any time you want to know please ask away!

This is amazing, guys. There's so much more I want to learn. If you too are interested and want to spread the word, make sure you look at Chrissy's website. She has her own story as well as interviews with others and tons of information about the scientific community's research progress. 

A few more links of Chrissy's--make sure to like and follow:



Thank you, Chrissy, for taking the time to do this interview. I'm sure I'll have tons more questions for you!!

Monday, August 17, 2015

Pitch Wars 2015 Mentee Bio

PitchWars is happening! It's my first tour, and the excitement on Twitter is more contagious than the common cold at an elementary school. I'm jumping in (nixing my usual Tuesday post) and joining the fun at #PimpMyBio.

To quote Mal from Firefly:

"Wash, we got some local color happening. A grand entrance would not go amiss."

Time to roll out the red carpet--or rather, fire up the Get-to-Know-Emily engines.

About Me

First off, my name is Emily--one of the most common girl names from the 90's. I like to consider myself an avid adventurer, but the truth is, I love status quo and routine. I also love chips, sandwiches, and a good book. Sailor Mercury is my spirit animal (except the fact that I hate studying and love to eat in general. So maybe I'm more Sailor Moon...).


My favorite Disney Prince as a kid was Aladdin, and I still haven't kicked the bad-boy/thief bucket quite yet. When I played D&D as a kid, I always picked the skillset of a thief, though I never got very far (they're kinda weak). The idea of stealing always sounded romantic to me.


Hold on, hold on. No, I'm not a kleptomaniac. In fact, I always obey the rules. Even traffic rules. The sign says no "U" turns? Okay! I won't U-turn, even if the person ahead of me (who's supposed to be guiding me to the restaurant) does.

Dear Mentors,

I will be the first to admit I have a hard time with criticism, as much as the next person (as long as the "next person" isn't Ghandi or Mother Theresa or something). But I am desperately in love with my book. And not the surface-level kind of affection. This is a swim oceans, traverse desserts sort of thing. I am ready and willing to make any changes necessary to my book to make it the best it can be.

Pick me!!! Ahem. Sorry. Couldn't help it...

Color me excited and hopeful. :)


Thursday, August 13, 2015

First is the Worst

Time for a confession, readers. My sweet, easy-going demeanor covers a dirty secret:

I'm slit-your-throat competitive. 

Except I don't go announcing it. Instead I keep it bottled up and hidden.

Until now.

Woops.

Believe it or not, the italicized confession above is 100% true. In fact, I had such a hard time reading when I was a kid because I wasn't perfect right away. Rather than painfully sound words out, I refused to read at all.


Obviously I've had some personality growth since my five-year-old days. Proof in the fact that I am typing this.

Even still, at 22 I hate to be anything other than first. I hate participating in anything where I might not be picked as Number One, The Lead, or win the Biggest Prize. You could say, rather than I'm overly competitive, that I have an ego/pride problem. I wouldn't correct you there.

This summer has been full of writing contests (contests which I've eagerly entered). And in none of them have I "won" the elusive (and mostly figurative) First Place.

My pride is rather irked at this. So much so that it brings to mind the elementary poem:

First is the worst.
Second is the best.
Third is the one with the treasure chest.

Though for third, with immature fifth graders, it was usually Third is the one with the hairy chest.

But I'm turning over a new leaf. Or at least attempting to. There's nothing wrong with being "unperfect," "last place," or "a greenie."

Wherever you are in the Scale of Life, embrace it. Each moment is fleeting. Be thankful for the opportunity and for the adventure.

I'm trying to be.

*Don't forget to enter my contest for a $15 Amazon gift card--only 18 DAYS left!

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Continuing the Adventure--With Pointy Sticks

This summer is shaping up to be one of the most memorable--and one of the most picture documented.

I'm now halfway through my Summer Bucket List!  Considering I have until the last day of summer (September 23rd), I think I'm doing pretty good.

Last Saturday I checked off the ever-delicious, ever-fun: Make a New Recipe.

And make we did. My fellow chefs assembled with asked for ingredients.


Technically only two of us "made" the food. Which earned us a pre-dinner sample. Having never made kabobs before, I was a little nervous. So nervous I almost forgot to soak said bamboo sticks before shoving them in the oven.

Fire, anyone?

But, thanks to the cooking skills of my partner in crime, the marinated kebabs came out perfectly. I, on the other hand, suffered my usual malady of crunchy rice (which I managed to correct, thank you very much).


Tastebuds singing? Here's the recipe we used.

Thanks, Natalie, Maddie, Jeremy, and Sam for cooking with me!

...Did I mention we had sundaes for dessert? ;)

Thursday, August 6, 2015

Idea to Pages: Prepping My Muse

Emily Layne's Steps to Write a Book:

Step One: The Inspiration & Jewelry
Step Two: Prepping My Muse

I'm jumping back into the blog series Idea to Pages, and I will discuss Step Two--Prepping My Muse. Believe it or not, I've just started this part of brainstorming today.

It's been a really busy summer, okay?!

Ahem.

Molding My Muse involves a lot of different steps that vary from book-to-book, but two things always remain the same. Pinterest and music. I stalk Pinterest looking for pictures of my characters and their world to really figure out what I want it to look like.

...This unfortunately requires Internet, and I live in an area where Internet is not plenteous. So it's taken me awhile to get to this step.


Music, on the other hand, has already been playing in my mind. My sister, Maddie, being the awesome DJ she is, makes me a CD for every book. Her song choice is stellar (especially considering our music tastes differ) and are the perfect brainstorming background for my work commute.

Here are my top three songs for SECOND-HAND SCAVENGERS...




What about you? How do you spark your muse?

Up next: Building My World

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

100th Post Celebration

Guys, we've made it.

This post officially marks the 100th post I've made since I started my blog on July 1, 2014.

I've come a long way from Going Official, and so many things have changed!

Help me celebrate this exciting achievement by entering a contest for a $15.00 Amazon gift card! Plus, if you send me your first chapter before August 28th, I'll do a free critique!

Here's to another 100 posts. Who knows, by then I might be... *GASP* ... An agented writer!

LET'S PARTY!